A photoshop first

We're so used to seeing celebrities getting slimmed down on the photoshop, but it can actually also be used to add some fat! Here are the promo posters for the new season of The Simple Life.

Paris is not a virgin after all

Randy Spelling (blue cap), son of Aaron Spelling is claiming that he stole Paris's precious virginity at 15! He was 17. They dated for over 2 months until her dumb-ass grandma pulled them apart. Grandmas always know what's going on, she probably smelled all the jizz on Paris's body.

"HOLLYWOOD - Socialite Paris Hilton lost her virginity to TV producer Aaron Spelling's son Randy, according to the former Sunset Beach star himself.

The 26-year-old actor, who co-starred with his former flame in the 2006 straight-to-video movie Pledge This!, claims they had sex together when Hilton was just 15--three years shy of the legal age of consent in California.

Randy tells the New York Daily News, "We were together for, like, two months.

"We went to Palm Springs once for the weekend, and we couldn't check into the hotel under her name because her grandma was looking for her.

"She was, like, 15; I was 17. And what do you know, I hear this knock-knock-knock on the door, and I look out and her grandma's there. And then I look out the window and I see Paris in a full-on dress with a suitcase running down the golf course. We broke up like a week later."

Randy said he recently bumped into Hilton at a Los Angeles nightclub, and she has a special place in her heart for him.

He enthuses, "She came up to me and she was like, 'I want to say hi to Randy.' She was like, 'Randy took my virginity. I want to say hi.'"

Randy's Sons of Hollywood reality TV costar David Weintraub, adds, "Randy was Paris' number one and her number 50 and number 150.""

Ha! Number 150, and she reached that number when she was 18 so who knows where she's at now.

I bet you that was in Paris's vagina

Paris Hilton and future Jesse Metcalfe, Josh Henderson were caught sucking at Hugh Hefner's 81st birthday over at the Palms in Las Vegas. That red and white shoe looks awesome by the way, wonder what brand it is? Yeah Paris is just that un-entertaining, I'd rather stare at a shoe.

Source Hollywood Rag

Hypoglycemia is the new anorexia

Reps for Simple Life star Nicole Richie have explained her continues passing out on the set of her reality show on "hypoglycemia."

"In her ongoing effort to focus on her well-being, Nicole has recently been diagnosed with hypoglycemia. [She] is taking steps to manage it.”

What they meant to say was, "In her ongoing effort to mask her real problems, Nicole has decided to blame some random disease that rarerly makes people faint."

Get well soon!

Source ExtraTV

STDs galore

Paris Hilton looking like a fat-ass next to Posh's evil twin. When the hell are they going to give Jenna her own reality show? Someone act fast before she completely decays.

Source Egotastic

Eww, he's gonna get all diseased

Paris Hilton has apparently left Niarchos for Desperate Housewive's star Josh Henderson. In typical Hilton fashion all this happened in about a day and a half. The couple along with two other guys were seen hitting the night clubs then left to Paris's house for a cocaine infused orgy, or some other activity.

Source X17

Not a good morning

The Simple Life star Paris Hilton is probably jealous she ain't in the headlines no more. So what does her feeble little mind come up with? She takes advantage of her best (and only) talent!

That penis belongs to none other than Cee Lo from Gnarls Barkley. I guess fame does do wonders.

Source Media Take Out
NSFW version here

The Simple Life preview

I liked it more when they went to those small-ass country towns, but oh well, the LAPD won't let these two go far. Here are our beloved goofs during more filming of The Simple Life. The show is set to premiere sometime in summer, and will feature the girls as counselors for a fat camp, beauty camp, marriage camp among others.



Thanks to Just Jared.

Ahh, it all makes sense now!

By now we all know that the next installment of The Simple Life will feature dumb and dumber as Camp Counselors, but that premise seemed kinda boring, of course leave it to the smart-smarts at E! to come up with this great concept, Fat Camp Counselors!

That's right; and honestly who better to turn fat chicks into anorexic... er healthy women? Why Nicole and Paris of course!

Damn you The Simple Life, you've already got me hooked.

Thanks to Just Jared!